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 最近看了很多学生的作文,也结合了一些考官的作文,笔者发现在传统雅思议论文结尾中其实蕴含了很多变化。在接下来的文章里,我将就这些新写法做一小结,并对比它们和传统写法的区别:

 

一、传统结尾三要素

 

想要了解新变化,我们必须先从传统写法说起。传统的议论文结尾一般包含了以下三个写作要素,即:回顾观点对立面;重申自己观点或立场;展望或建议。第一个写作要素的概念是对于主体段中的次论段的观点进行小结,既可以是全部论点的概括,也可以是将其中几个主要分论点进行列举;而第二个写作要素是整个结尾段的核心,即观点的表达。若开头段并没有表明立场,则必须在最后一段里提出;若开头段的主题句里已经阐明了自己的主张,则结尾段里需要变化一种方式重提即可;最后一个传统写作要素分为了二个方面,即前面的立场是持积极或肯定时,通过展望来深化全文的主题;但倘若前面的观点是消极或否定时,则是通过提出建议来结束你的作文。说到这里,有同学可能会有这样的疑问:若结尾采用中立方式,则该怎么写?又若是遇到分析解决型的大作文,结尾是不是也是采用同样的写法?我的回答是:不论何种体裁的议论文,传统的这三个要素的写法都适合,只是在具体操作的时候略有不同。比如写中立结尾的时候,由于你的观点没有倾向性,则第一个写作要素“回顾对立面”就可以“缺省”,而先把中立的立场表达出来,然后再进行展望或建议,但由于观点的中立性特点,所以一般在第三个要素的选择上,我建议采用展望的写法。同样,遇到分析解决型大作文,在写结尾段时由于题目本身没有办法给出一个倾向的观点,因此传统要素里的第二个要素就不需要写了,而保留另外二个。其中,第三个要素我会提示学生使用建议的写法,这是因为这类大作文基本都是讨论些社会负面现象或问题,所以提出建议的写法更符合题干的社会背景。

 

In short, despite the fact that the process of animal testing seems cruel and bloody, I still believe that it is imperative for medical research and operation techniques and that it will continue to benefit humans in more wonderful ways.

 

这是一个标准的、有倾向性结尾的例子,作者使用了一个复合句将三个写作要素都包含在内。值得一提的是由于他支持动物实验,所以属于“积极或肯定”的立场,所以在第三个要素的选择上使用了展望的写法。

 

All in all, it is sometimes true that corporal punishment can be a useful way of discipline; I feel strongly that it should become the last choice for parents. If we want to build a world with less violence, we must begin at home and teach our children to be more responsible.

 

在这个结尾段中,作者持反对的态度,所谓“last choice”, 事实上并不会选择,而是一种反对的表达方式,这点考生可以学习下。由于观点是属于“消极或否定”,因此他最后采用了一个条件状语从句的方式来给出建议,并且态度是比较“坚决”的。

 

In summary, it is really difficult to say whether the advantages of international tourism have outnumbered the disadvantages. What we may have to consider is how to accept this trend as positive, while at the same time, staying away from its drawbacks.

 

这是一个中立的结尾,所以作者在第一句话中直接表达了没有倾向的立场。值得一提的是中立也算是一种观点。紧接着他就通过展望的方式表达了“兴利除弊”的构想。

 

To conclude, there is no absolute answer as to whether modern universities should adopt the liberal education or implement a more specialized education. It largely depends on the teaching resource each school can possess.

 

这个中立的结尾采用了相似的思路,即首句就表达了中立的立场;而在展望部分,作者提出了一个建设性的条件,这样的展望写法也是很值得借鉴的。

 

All in all, the phenomenon of crime cannot be eliminated completely. Yet, if all the measures I have suggested here were taken, I am convinced that we would see some improvements.

 

这是一个分析解决型大作文的结尾,由于无法给出倾向性的立场,所以作者采用了写其他二个要素的方式,但是在回顾的时候他先承认了现状无法改变的事实,然后再提出一些建设性的意见。所以这样的写法也是可以普遍被此类大作文采用的。

 

除了上述例子中我们学到的一些固定句式外,我们还可以经常使用以下这些句子来引导这些写作思路:

 

  It is true that to do…but…

  But we can try our best to reduce the negative…

  What we must do is to make sure…

  Therefore, it is strongly suggested that…

  (methods/steps/measures) should be taken to correct…

  Both government and ordinary citizens should join hands to …

  As a result, it is projected that…

  My prediction about… is that…

  Personally, I envision a future when…

  To be sure, … will bring about profound changes in…

  Indeed, … are something we cannot afford to ignore…

 

二、新写法中需要增加的写作要素

 

在新的写法中,我们可以增加的写作元素包括:原因,条件等,换言之,在给出自己的观点后,我们可以继续通过其他方式来深化主题,从而达到更好的表达效果,为作文增光添彩。首先我们来看一个例子:

 

Therefore, in spite of some opposition, I still feel that charging visitors abroad a higher fee should continue to be implemented in some developing countries, especially in those very poor nations in Africa and Asia. Meanwhile, I wish the local governments would use the money sensibly to help the residents and protect their beautiful land and precious historical sites. Only by doing so will international tourism contribute to a win-win result.

 

这个结尾前面部分都采用了传统的写法,即回顾,提出观点和展望。但是在最后一个句子里,作者增加了一个条件,采用了倒装句的方式,这样做的好处在于在展望的基础上继续深化了题干的主题,当地通过收取海外游客更高的费用来促进自身经济发展,这种做法作者是支持的,而最后这个条件的设定则延伸到了国际旅游的积极意义上。

 

Accordingly, I am in favor of the view that women should be given the equal rights to do whatever they like just as men and they should be allowed to join army, the navy, and the air force because they are really suited.

 

这个结尾的题目讲的是女性是否应该参军或者加入警察队伍。在结束部分,作者增加了一个原因,而这个原因其实并不需要在前面的主体段中提及,只是放在最后表达了作者个人的情感因素,从而增加文章的感情色彩,因此也不失为一个好的方法。

 

Striking a work-life balance isn't a one-shot deal. Creating balance in our life is a continuous process. But balance doesn't mean doing everything. Therefore, we need to examine our priorities and set boundaries and be firm in what we can and cannot do. Only we can restore harmony to our lifestyle.

 

这是一个分析解决型的大作文的结尾,从划线的二个句子来看,前者描述了为什么短期内平衡工作和生活不是件容易的事情;而后者则给出了条件,即事在人为。从这个例子中,我们得到的启发是将原因和条件这二个“新”元素和其他三个传统要素相融合,不是机械式地按部就班,而是灵活地根据结尾原来设定好的意思穿插在其中。这样使得表达效果就更好了。

 

Tobacco should be made illegal, I agree with this idea personally. I hope most drugs can be made illegal, because, as far as I know, they are bad to our health. However, currently most countries still keep it free to use tobacco, and this situation seems to be very hard to change in a short time.

 

同样的方法可以从这个结尾段中看到,作者在表达自己的立场后马上给出了一个原因,而这个原因不是之前提到过的,而是带有作者自己明显的感情色彩。因此,我们一开始在结尾段中增加原因这个要素时,可先从观点句后写起,慢慢再进行顺序的变化。

 

Certainly, medical care and education both play dominant roles, but building theaters and sports stadiums will benefit not only the individual both mentally and physically, but a nation and continent permanently because they lead to a healthy lifestyle both mentally and physically.

 

这个结尾段将观点和展望结合在了一个句子里面,作者通过最后一句原因的描述,很好地补充了投资体育设施和艺术文化设施的深远影响,从而深化了主题。

 

通过上述几个简单的例子,我们已经对于新写法有了一个比较全面的认识,在实施这套写法时,首先我们需要用传统的三个写作要素去构思结尾的整个意思,然后将原因和条件各选一个意思插入结尾段的整个意思中去,这时候,原来的三个要素中,我们可能需要去掉一二个,比如去掉回顾观点对立面的部分或者去掉展望或建议,也可以保留传统的三个要素。总之,在写的时候需要多花1-2分钟整体构思下结尾的意思,方可动笔写。

 

  In conclusion, real public museums will never be replaced by the Internet, as computer technology is just a supplementary mean to cope museums offer better services to the public.

 

  In most societies, people with competitive spirit are more determined to do more and achieve more while businesses are obliged to learn to become increasingly efficient. Thus, competition is really an essential power to move society ahead, as if by an invisible hand. This is because ultimately, competition is good as it sets goals for people and fills the social environment with excitement.

 

  After all, greed being a human instinct, consumers have only themselves to blame for their foolishness toward advertisements. Since outlawing commercial advertising is out of the question, people should educate themselves to be more prudent in buying and spending behaviors. As for consumers, what better measures can be taken to protect themselves other than self-control?

 

  The point is that sending criminals to prison is effective, if only by moving them away from the community. On the other hand, to regard prison education as an effective "punishment" is simply wishful-thinking, in view of relevant evidence that underlies recidivism. In all events, education provides opportunities, however limited, but it depends on the way those repeat offenders see these opportunities, the rest being pure guessing.

 

  It becomes clear that governments should not only provide funding for scientific research but also support experimental development for "non-scientific" research, since both kinds of research are essential to society in progress. Accordingly, it is always good to remember that research for physics, chemistry and biology carries more weight and usually deserves more public money; nevertheless, it is also important not to forget research for less useful subjects.

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